Silent Monks Hallelujah Chorus

Wings

High on the steeple the black raven stands
Watching below with beady bright eyes.
Seeing the pain in her heart, in her hands,
Hearing her loneliness echo in sighs.

The night winds blow over, scattering mist,
While moonlight shine softly, yet bright on her bed.
She sits and he watches her pale features twist
In despair unexpressed, in pain never said.

She moves in the shaft of the moonbeam so bright,
And a glinting of silver he spies in her grasp.
Her tears are fast-falling, like diamonds of light,
Silent as the steel of the knife that she clasps.

Too late does he realize her darkened intent.
Too late does his warning cry ring to the skies.
Fear, Longing, Despair to her willpower lent.
Her soft hands are limp, as bleeding she lies.

He soars to her window and raps to get in.
He beats with his wings on the time-darkened shutters.
But no answer, no movement, no sound from within.
No sign that the once faithful heartbeat yet flutters.

Still is the night, though bright shines the moon
On the Raven, the Church and the girl no more weeping.
Her life, once the light of the sun at high noon
Now pale, and at peace, and for ever is sleeping.

© Aisha 2009

 ~ ~ ~

My Dear Readers,

Be not alarmed when you read this, that it in any way reflects my state of being.
I have never been suicidal. I wrote this one night when the moon was shining bright on the housetops and the church across the street, and Edgar Allan Poe's raven, and the Eagles from The Hobbit, and the walk I had taken in the forest, where the crows were flying in masses, were all sort of playing in my head, and the moonlight was really bewitching.
So pray, examine it for literary reasons, and tell me what you think! :)

Thanks for reading!
- Aisha

I bless the Lord.

I have been stressing out all day, and sort of forgetting that God is in charge. My SAT is approaching way too fast, and I really feel very inadequately prepared for it. Not a good feeling. Makes me irritable, and more than once today I've been sharp with my brother, impatient with my mother, and not bothering that anybody else is also human and needs kindness. Selfish much?

Then I hear this song, or one from the same album:


Running out of my bedroom to tend something in some other part of the house, or bent over my books, my mind spinning rather like the fan in my laptop, trying to work and cool off at the same time, and usually just overheating until I close something that's sucking too much CPU! Then this song comes up in my iTunes playlist, and, whether I'm running, or spinning, or thinking, or just stressing--for a moment, I stop.
For a moment I am still.
For a moment, there is silence.
For a moment I hear a still, small, sweet voice reminding me of who is in charge. And I say a prayer, for anything, whether it be strength, faith, courage for myself, or healing, endurance, provision, patience, etc., for a loved one.
And for a moment I can breathe.
For a moment I have peace.

Until the next thought catches me and I'm running, or bent over the books, or any one of the many whatever-I-need-to-be-doing-right-now things.

If it weren't for these fleeting moments of stillness, I think my head would fly right off.

~ ~ ~

Psalm 46:10

"Be still and know that I am God.
I will be exalted among the nations.
I will be exalted in the earth!"

(including exalted over my SAT!)

Bless the Lord, O my soul!

I heard a bird on Presidents' Day,
Outside my window, in a snowy way.
His tweets were joined
   by other birds',
They twitted and chirped
   their birdy words.
It seemed as though they tried to say
"Good morning! Wake up! It's a beautiful Day!"

© Aisha 2010
~~~~~

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases;
his mercies never come to an end;
they are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
"The Lord is my portion," says my soul,
"therefore I will hope in Him."
~ Lamentations 3:22-24

Psalm 130:5-8

^{I think this is my favorite passage in the Psalms.}

I wait for the LORD, my soul waits,
and in his word I hope;
my soul waits for the Lord
more than watchmen for the morning,
more than watchmen for the morning.
O Israel, hope in the LORD!
For with the LORD there is steadfast love,
and with him is plentiful redemption.
And he will redeem Israel
from all his iniquities.

Diguised

Laughing into the face of the sun,
Dancing in the rain,
Smiling when I look in your eyes,
My heart bleeding on in vain.

I even hide it from myself:
I tell myself I don't love you.
But every day I miss you more,
And every night I think of you.

Just watch me shine. I'm all alive!
The joy of the party, the song of the dance.
I sparkle in youthful merriment,
I glow in carefree romance.

I look like I don't have a care,
I know no pain, I fear no hurt.
But deep inside and hardly known
I ache for your smile, long for your heart.

I'll never leave, or turn away:
Loving across a wide expanse.
And smiling as you walk away
To live your life, I'll watch you dance.

I'll never show, you'll never guess
The wound you made that will not heal.
Nor perceive the love you just passed up,
The joy we might have made so real.

'Cause I'm smiling into the face of the sun,
Dancing in the rain.
Laughing when I want to cry.
Singing to disguise the pain.

© Aisha 2009

I think I'm on the verge of a dream realization.
And it positively thrills me.
I have told one or two of you, but now, it will out. :) I cannot hold it in any longer.
I have been taking counsel, gathering information, discussing, and praying like crazy, and now, I believe I have decided.

I.
Am.
Going.
To.
NSA!!!!!!!!!1

I swear my life is turned entirely upsidedown! In a good way.

Um...NSA stands for New Saint Andrews, by the way, for those of you who may not know.
It's a Classical Christian college in Moscow, Idaho, and...I'm excited.
I am endeavoring to make it this fall, but I don't know if I'll be able to. (Of course, it all depends on whether or not they accept me. I hope with all my heart that they do!) I don't have a job at this moment, which fact makes me kind of sad. But I am seeking one, and I am actively trusting the Lord to provide.

So. That is my bit of news for the day.
Your prayers would be muchly appreciated.

*happiness*